Cheating, falling, and poses

So, I am a terrible ashtangi and I skipped practice yesterday morning. In all fairness, I skipped life entirely and spent the whole day in bed with a great novel and my cats. I only had minor guilt issues about not practicing, and felt like my knees and shoulder (and brain) could just use a day of horizontal nothingness.

This morning it was back to the outside world, -30 temperatures be damned! I feel like it was a productive practice today. I wasn’t particularly open or strong but I had a good problem solving session with my teacher about my uncooperative knees and I got poses, so yay! I was careful and slow in all things potentially knee harming, but the pain was still there. I am slowly getting over my anxiety about chakrasana again. I did it once assisted and once solo today, with no neck injuries. As long as I don’t psych myself out about it, I’m fine. My shoulder was grateful for yesterdays rest and felt almost 100% better. Dropping back was pretty great today, mostly controlled with a gentle landing. Standing up was another matter. It got ugly. I stumbled backwards and fell today (thankfully there were only a few other students there, who I managed not to trample). I’m not getting frustrated yet, but I was feeling a serious lack of confidence after that. I got a helpful reminder not to get too in my head about it and the next two were quite a bit better. I’m having trouble engaging the backs of my legs and core on the way up; all I can think about is just getting up to standing. Tomorrow is another day, and I will continue to try to work on it. Every practice I think “tomorrow I’m going to ace that” about the poses I struggle in, and drop backs have become the focus of that optimism as of late.

I am now three poses away from having a compete primary practice!! I feel so excited about that. I got up to supta padangusthasana today, which I can do because none of the poses between baddha konasana and supta p involve lotus. I’m going to  reach my practice goal for 2012 in no time, maybe I should shoot higher?

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